Because Of You.

I feel as though over the years my heart has changed shape.

Chipping away at my heart, my arteries and veins

have carved your name; it may sound insane

But why else would my heart favour you

over any other, so it must be true.

I refuse to believe I am in love

Indeed I am in deep attachment to you

I tell myself to get a grip and move on

From this childhood crush

But then I feel my blood rush

In a rage, defiantly

As if you have a control over me internally

At least I have my mind, right?

That you cannot control

I tell myself that anyway, because

You already have a hold on my soul

So I'll be the commander of my thoughts

And I’ll think about whatever I want

But I can't focus I can't sieve through my mind

Because my heart is too loud

I can’t focus when it is the only sound

My heart screams your name throughout my body

Distorting the functions of my organs

And they begin to chant along too

So I give in to the internal screams for a moment

And reminisce back to the days of innocence

To the conception of this sensuality

Back to when you were first introduced to me

As if with a simple hello

You planted a seed in my heart

Which grew with time and

Beckoned my soul towards you

To this point, where I am weak
Because of you.

Marriage

Like every other girl, I used to dream too

Of getting married

To my knight in shining armour

Arriving in our horse and carriage

But knights are only in fairytales

With happy ever afters

And those sort of endings don’t exist

Unless it’s in the hereafter

So I pray for a companion

A person that will be my best friend

Who believes in the creator

And knows that this world will surely end

Money, fast cars and big houses

These things dont mean anything to me

The reality of this world is temporal

And it’s only in religion that we’ll find stability

So he doesn’t have to be a doctor or a lawyer

I’d much rather he be a shepherd

Like our beloved Muhammad Mustafa

And love for the sake of Allah

Someone whos heart is beautiful

He will help complete half my deen

Someone who is loving and humble

Together we’ll strive for the life of the unseen

We’ll share a hunger for knowledge

He doesn’t have to be a graduate with a degree

Together we’ll indulge in worship

And build a relationship based on piety

Not an ounce of arrogance or pride

Every word gentle off his tongue

He’ll respect and honour the old

And be patient with the young

Showing kindness to others

Helping the needy and giving to charity

Praying salah and fasting in ramadhan

Will be his passion not only his duty

I don’t hope for perfection

I do not dream of a prince charming you see

Nor of a knight in shining armour

But rather someone with the same goal as me

A Thief that steals youth

And beauty taking it from you

unknowingly

Replacing it with wisdom

A professional that can

Make the rich poor

And give it all

To another

A healer that can

Mend broken ties

And heart ache

A friend that shows

What is true

And what is fake.

Time.